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Plagues, Pandemics & Viruses- The Message of the 10 Plagues in Modern Times

3/15/2021

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The year 2020 will forever be remembered as a year of global chaos and turmoil. The new year was welcomed by all with a renewed sense of hope, but with an underlying insecurity as to whether 2021 will really be any different. 
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As Passover approaches, it is befitting that we look towards the story of the Exodus for direction and perspective. In so many ways we can draw a parallel between what we are experiencing in our own times and what God put the Egyptians through in the hope that they would change. Pharaoh and the Egyptians did not get the message, which led to the country’s downfall. But with our eyes open, we can take the message to heart, and use these uncertain times as the impetus to grow and become even greater. 

The classic reading of the Torah’s account of the 10 plagues might not seem like the most relevant story to our modern day era. When was the last time God took down a mighty empire by unleashing a host of open miracles and wonders, anyhow? But when we look a little deeper at what the actual plagues represented, and what message they contained, one can see how relevant they are to our times.     
  
The plague of blood was an attack on the Nile river, the source of Egypt’s endless abundance and prosperity. Without the need for rain they felt completely independent of needing God, giving them license to view themselves as deities. The visual of blood, a symbol of blessing, turning to blood, a symbol of pain, was meant to capture their attention and make them realize that prosperity can be a source of blessing or a source of misery. Put in this context, one might argue that our generation can very much relate to this plague, as we see the most affluent generation in the history of mankind suffering from crumbling morals and widespread sadness. Observing the lifestyles of the rich and famous- so many of whom seem to be living very dysfunctional lifestyles- just confirms that “water”, or abundance, without recognition of God, eventually turns to “blood” or misery.  

The constant croaking of the second plague of frogs gave the Egyptians no respite from the terrible noise, just as we are suffering from an endless stream of terrible noise from our media and social media, and its constant spread of slander and hate. The plague of lice were meant to show the Egyptians that God can cripple the mightiest of empires through the most miniscule of messengers, a very relatable plague in a world that is only beginning to recover from an almost invisible virus. 

Though we might not see lions and bears running through our streets as what occurred in the fourth plague of mixed wild animals, who cannot say that when we see the shattering glass, graffitied storefronts, and scorched buildings after yet another riot, it doesn’t feel that we were not attacked by a herd of wild animals? 

The fifth plague of pestilence was an attack on the domestic animals who were worshipped as Gods by the pagan Egyptians. Though pagan worship is fairly uncommon today, one does wonder whether our society's obsession with celebrities, movie stars and sports figures borderlines on idol worship. And, perhaps, this is why our initial wake up call that Covid-19 should be taken seriously was when professional sports and the entertainment industry closed up shop, a very similar message, perhaps, to what God was communicating to Egypt in this fifth plague.
  
The sixth plague of boils was the punishment for the Egyptians obsession with their sexuality. As a result the boils made them embarrassed about how they looked. This can be taken as a wake-up call to a culture that has put so much emphasis on looking a certain way, that we have produced a generation of young people who feel ashamed about their looks as if they possess some sort of defect, even though there is nothing wrong with them at all! 

And while we are not getting attacked with hailstorms of fire and ice crashinging through the atmosphere, as how it occurred during the seventh plague, we are struggling with the heated debate of whether we are damaging that atmosphere to a point that it will be beyond repair. 

Surely, the millions of business owners who saw their businesses fall apart this past year by the coronavirus can certainly relate to the eighth plague that saw locusts devour whatever was left of the Egyptian crops, completely crippled their economy. 

Perhaps, none of the plagues are more relatable to our society today than the final two. The ninth plague featured a darkness that was more than just a dimming of the sun. It was described as a heavy and thick darkness that completely paralyzed Egypt so that they could not get up or sit down. This brings to mind the overall mental and emotional health of our generation, with so many whose anxiety and depression feel like a dark cloud that makes even the simplest of tasks difficult.  

And finally, the final plague that targeted the Eguptian firstborns who were considered the leaders in Egypt. The firstborn were attacked because of their failure to lead Egypt in a way that was honorable. This collapse of leadership is something that we are being plagued with in modern day society as well, as many of our politicians and world leaders certainly fall short of being considered reputable and often lack even the basic decency.

But there is good news in all this. The ten plagues was God’s way of saying that it was time to usher in a new reality. It was the birthing of the Jewish people who would go on to receive the Torah and bring new values and enlightenment to the world. We can only hope and pray that the ten plagues of today are once again the Almighty’s way of waking us up and calling on us to take notice of Him, to be ambassadors of a higher system of values, and to be ready to welcome in a new dawn and a much brighter future. 
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Rabbi Buxbaum’s 20 Questions to Engage Any Adult in the Passover Seder

4/5/2016

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The Passover Seder is supposed to be fun and engaging to anyone we find present around the table. We read about how the “wise son” receives wisdom, the “evil son” receives sharp confrontation, the “simple son” is taught the ABC’s of Judaism, and the “one who doesn’t know how to ask” is engaged in dialogue that will open him up.

Many of us know how to engage kids with fun games, props, junk food, and the promise of really cool Afikomen presents. But how do we engage the adults and make sure the Passover Seder becomes more than an annual family get-together featuring matzah and Manishevitz?

Questions that provoke discussion about relevant topics can help bring your Seder to life. Here are 20 conversation-starters for your Seder table that will help you engage even the least interested guests. You can pose the questions yourself, or- with a little pre-passover prep- you can create conversation cards and hand them out to your guests for them to facilitate the conversation.

1. When doing the “salt water dip”: Has anything ever happened to you which seemed bitter at the time but later turned out to be sweet?

2. When breaking the Matzah and hiding the Afikomen: What is a “hidden” aspiration that you have, i.e. something that you have postponed for later in life but you plan/aspire to one day get to?

3. When speaking about God’s promise to Abraham: What can we learn from Abraham about standing up for what you believe against popular belief? Are we living up to our title as the "children of Abraham"?

4. What contributions have the Jewish people made to humanity over history?


5. When speaking about how the Jewish people were sent down to Egypt: How have the hardships in our life helped us become better people?

6. During Vehi She’Amdah:
Why has there always been so much hate and discrimination including antisemitism and racism in the world? Does it still exist today?

7. When speaking about the beginnings of Jewish life in Egypt: How does the Jewish people’s assimilation into Egyptian culture resemble Jewish assimilation throughout history?

8. When speaking about Jewish identity in Egypt: What does Jewish identity mean in Exile? What role does your religion and culture play in your life as an American?

9. When speaking about the harsh slavery: In our day-to-day lives, do we really love what we do or are we more like slaves to our work?

10. The word Mitzraim resembles the Hebrew word for constriction. What is our personal Mitzrayim? What is holding us back the most?

11. When speaking about the plagues: Are there signs in our life pushing us to change that we are just refusing to see?

12. Are there signs around us that God exists? What are they?

13. Pharaoh Vs. Moshe: What are the ingredients to be a great leader?

14. When speaking about the various miracles: Does the existence of the Jewish people defy the natural order of the world? Are we a miracle?

15. If you knew 100% that God would help you succeed- even through miracles- what new endeavor would you take on?

16. When speaking about jumping in the Red Sea: What have you done recently to step out of your comfort zone?

17. When singing Dayneu: What are the gifts in our life that make it all worth it?

18. What Mitzvot/Jewish gifts are you most appreciative of? Israel? Shabbat? Torah? Something else?

19. When reciting Hallel: If you could fully express gratitude to someone in your past who really made a difference in your life, who would it be?

20. When eating Matzah: If you could eradicate laziness from your life and live with complete discipline, what would you accomplish?
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The Pain of Transition

4/5/2016

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The placement of the Maror in the order of the Seder is quite mysterious. 
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When we observe the 15 steps of the Seder, we see that there is a clear path of ascension.   Our actions throughout the night take us through a virtual journey where we, ourselves, are experiencing a trek from bondage to freedom. Corresponding to the 15 steps entering into the courtyard of the Beit HaMikdash, every act that we do seems to take us one step farther away from the salty tears of Karpas to the festive bliss of Hallel and Nirtzah. 

When we reach the middle five steps of the Seder, we find ourselves at a point of transition. The four steps revolving around Matzah and Maror are a recreation of the ceremony that the Jewish nation performed while still in Egypt but already smelling the scent of freedom. As we eat the Matzah and lean, it seems that we have finally gotten to the place in the Seder where we, too, are smelling the scent of freedom and it smells a lot like the delicious Shulchan Aruch food that is only a few minutes away.

And it is at that point of transition, moments away from freedom, when the Maror ceremony commences.
Maror. The symbol of bitterness. The symbol of pain. Chicken soup with Kosher for Pesach Luckshen is on our mind, yet tears of suffering are pouring down are cheeks! How do we understand this contradiction of emotions we are supposed to be experiencing at this time? And why would the Jewish nation be commanded to be eating Maror while still in slavery and specifically at a time when they are beginning their freedom? What are we to make of this?

Many suggest that the message here is one of “never forget where you came from” or “realize that it was the pain of the past that got you to this point”. But, I would like to suggest a somewhat different approach based on my work with so many people who are trying to make major changes in their lives, to go from whatever “slavery” they are experiencing in their life to whatever “freedom” they are looking for. It can be the slavery of an addiction, of a toxic relationship, of a dead-end job, or of a life without Torah values.  
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The message of Maror smack in the middle of the Seder can very well be teaching us that as difficult as slavery is, very often the pain of transitioning out of that slavery can be even harder, more painful and certainly scarier. For as bad as that slavery may seem, there is a certain complacency and comfort that is present, and the idea of having to pick up and enter into a “desert” without knowing what will happen there can be absolutely frightening. 

Certainly, one who pays close attention to the subtle hints of the Torah and of our Sages can see that this was not an easy task for the Jewish people. We know that only a small number of Jews actually left Egypt. We read how when they are commanded to “request a man from his friend (rayaihu)” silver and gold vessels (Shemos 11:2), an usual term of affection referring to their Egyptian masters. And we see how whenever anything goes wrong in the Desert, some Jews fondly reminisce about their time in Egypt and how they “sat by the pot of meat” and “ate bread till they were full” (Shemos 16:3).

The Maror teaches us to be sensitive of the pain of transition from slavery to freedom. To look around us and see if there are people in our life who are experiencing this pain and maybe longing for those “good old days” of slavery, when life was just more simple. And Maror is a time to look inward and ask ourselves if, perhaps, we are avoiding a potential Exodus in our own life because we are afraid of the Desert ahead. And if in fact we are, Maror is a time to strengthen ourselves and remind us that Shulchan Aruch is only moments away. 

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Chaos, Serenity and the Power of Words

10/14/2015

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We live in a world of massive neuro-stimulation. We are all super busy, always multi-tasking and usually scatter-brained. We live in a world where being “too busy” is a badge of honor, where life is an exhausting marathon just to get to the end of the day. There is no such thing as sacred time or sacred space. Even the toilet has become an online shopping mall via our smartphones.

What does all this do for us? Has it made us happier people? Not a chance. In fact has created all sorts of complications in our brains such as stress, anxiety, exhaustion, poor decision-making, and worst of all, a lack of real enjoyment of the beautiful world and beautiful people around us that take time to appreciate.

The Torah in Parshat Noach tells of a world gone corrupt. A flood, which the Torah calls the Mabul, comes to destroy humanity and only Noach survived by building a boat called the Teivah, the Ark. But deeper than this fascinating story, the Torah is hinting to us a very deep and powerful lesson that is timeless and priceless.

To understand this lesson, let’s focus our attention to some excerpts of an account written by a student a student of the great “Rebbe of the Warsaw Ghetto”, Rabbi Kalonymus Kalman Shapira of Piacetzna (1889-1943) about how to “quiet one’s mind” from the constant flow of stimulation that the world presents through a form of meditation, using holy words a as a form of a mantra.

The student writes:

In the year [1932-1933]… I was privileged to be called to a private meeting with the holy master…  who instructed us about this matter of “quieting the mind.” 

Our Holy Master shared with us his thesis that the ego constitutes a barrier to the heavenly flow. Thus, if one's thoughts and intellect are active, it is difficult for the heavenly flow to penetrate… Thus our goal is to come to a sleep-consciousness while we are awake. That is to say, we wish to stem the flow of thoughts and impulses that is endemic to the working of the mind.

He said first that one simply watches for a set period of time, observing his thoughts. He eventually will notice that the mind is emptying, his thoughts are slowing a bit from their habitual flow. He then must repeat a single verse or phrase, such as “God is truly God,” in order to insert a thought of holiness into his now open mind.  After these steps, he can articulate a need for help in any one of the areas of character development which he needs to work on, be it faith or love or awe…

This idea of setting aside time to quiet the mind by focusing on holy words, is perhaps a hidden message in the story of Noach and the Flood. If we take a close look at the most literal translation of the key words, we see this message playing out.

The word Mabul shares the root of the world Bilbul which means ‘chaos’. The name Noach shares the root of the word Menucha which means ‘serenity’ or ‘calmness’. So “Noach being saved from the Mabul” can also allude to finding calmness amid the chaos of life. And what is the vehicle that saves Naoch the Ark, or the Teivah. That word Teivah has an alternate meaning: words. It is the holy words that create calmness and serenity among the chaos of life, exactly the message that the Rebbe told his students.

Through our words we can move mountains. Our kind words can make people smile. Our words of Prayer can shake the heavens. And our inner words can help us find calmness and allow the heavenly flow to break through the storms of chaos that try to drown us out. 

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The Dance of Our Nation

9/30/2015

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-V'Zos HaBracha
The grand finale of the Torah is Parshat Zos HaBracha, which we read every year on the holiday of Simchat Torah.  Zos HaBracha, which means ‘this is the blessing’, relays the blessings the Moshe gave to each tribe immediately before his death.

While Moshe’s blessings seem to focus on their material matters, like “triumph” for Yehudah, “dew” and “crops” for Yosef, “the riches of the sea” for Zevulun, etc., our commentaries explain that there is a deeper meaning to each one which relates to the spiritual portion of each one.

Just as Yaakov, before his death, looked at his twelve sons and realized that each one of them has a very unique contribution that is a crucial piece to the puzzle that is the Jewish people, so too Moshe on his death bed reiterated that every tribe had its unique mission and style that is necessary to make the Jewish people function as a complete unit.

One can compare the twelve tribes to the twelve edges of any three dimensional physical object. When you bring all twelve edges together, it creates a new vessel with height, width and depth. For the Jewish people that vessel contains in it the holiness of the Shechina, Hashem’s dwelling in this world. This idea is represented as well in the twelve months of the year.

This idea also represents itself in the fact that Parshat Zos HaBracha is the 53rd Torah portion. The number 53 is the numerical value of the word Gan, which means garden. The Torah begins with the sad story of Adam and Eve being kicked out of the Garden of Eden which was a place where the Almighty’s presence was felt with complete clarity. The world is sent into turmoil and becomes a place of sin and destruction until Avraham and Sarah come along and build a dynasty that would restore the glory of Hashem in the world. Hence the dwelling of Hashem that was once in the Garden of Eden is restored through the children of Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov, the twelve tribes.

This vessel for the Divine dwelling is represented in the circles that we dance in on Simchat Torah. The completion of the cycle of leaving the Garden and then “returning” is represented in the circle that leaves its original point only to find its way back there. And in a circle, every person is equidistant from the center despite each one having their own viewpoint, just like the twelve tribes who each have differing spiritual missions but is necessary to complete the circle.

Simchat Torah is not just a day to celebrate the fact that we read 53 Torah portions. It is a day where we celebrate our own personal accomplishments in Torah and in Mitzvot. Have we joined the circle at some point over the last twelve months? Did we take on a new Mitzvah or learn something new? Did some part of Torah connect with us in a very deep way? Did we improve in any areas of our life because of a Torah teaching or new Mitzvah we embraced?

If so, we have so much to dance about on Simchat Torah. And even if we haven’t yet found our place in the Torah, let’s rejoice in the fact that there is a new year ahead and- just maybe- this year will bring us new clarity. But most importantly, let’s dance because we are a part of a special family where every single person matters and needed to complete the whole. Because, dear friend, without YOU on the dance floor, our circle is not complete!

So this Simchat Torah, just dance like nobody’s watching!

Chag Sameach and Mazel tov on completing another year!

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The Song of Our Lives

9/21/2015

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-Haazinu
A great Jewish composer of thousands of beautiful melodies was once asked to explain why his songs resonate so deeply with people. He answered that after he writes a song, he asks himself, does this song have the ability to bring someone to dance and does this have the ability to bring someone to cry. And if the answer is yes to both of those questions, only then will he release the song.

At the end of Moshe’s life he recites a Shirah, a song to the Jewish people, known as Haazinu, which is the name of this week’s Torah portion. The commentaries teach us that hidden in the words of this song is the story of the Jewish people as well as the story of every individual from the beginning of time until the coming of the Messiah.

Just like a moving song has its high notes and low notes, its minor chords and major chords, and it is the ups and downs of the melody that truly open up our hearts, so too the story of the Jewish people is so powerfully moving because of its extreme highs points and terribly low points. The song of the Jewish nation is certainly a song that you can dance to and that you can cry to.

The song of Haazinu is a moving ballad filled with both sadness and joy, bearing witness to the perfect, faultless, justice of Hashem. "The Rock -- His work is perfect, for all His ways are Justice, the G-d of faithfulness in Whom there is no wrong, He is righteous and straight!"

To be a Jew means to be ready to embrace the full experience of this symphony. The Torah way of life certainly leads us down a path of life that is truly pleasurable. It shows us how to get the maximum pleasure out of this world by informing us which kinds of enjoyment elevate us and which kinds of enjoyment destroy us. It gives us the tools to improve our relationships with our spouses, parents, children and loved ones. It infuses our life with meaning and a higher purpose and helps us transcend the pettiness of the mundane.  It brings together community and makes us feel part of something incredible.

But there is much pain as well in living a Jewish life. There is isolation. There is loneliness. There is inner strife. There is the awareness that there is Master of the World who is looking at us very closely and making sure that we don’t forget that we are in fact different than the rest of the world.

The Song of Haazinu is read during this holy time of year when we are doing our annual soul searching, to strengthen us to join in the singing, to embrace both the highs and the lows, to be ready to dance but also be ready to cry as we discover our own personal notes within this symphony of Jewish history. 

As we enter into the joyous days of Sukkot and Simchat Torah next week, let’s sing our songs with all our hearts and all our souls. The song is for YOU!   

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The Transcendence of Kol Nidrei

9/16/2015

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Yom Kippur eve, as the sun goes down and the holiness of the highest day of the year sets in, Jews all over the world will gather together to listen to the stirring declaration of Kol Nidrei. As the Chazzan stands before the congregation, dressed in white, with the Torah scrolls at his sides, and as everyone's hearts are filled with the excitement of starting fresh, one can feel the holiness in the air. Everything seems so picturesque, except for one thing.

As we begin to read through the words of this ancient paragraph, waiting for something inspiring to catch our eye and instill the feelings of the day's holiness, we instead find that the paragraph has very little to do with Yom Kippur ... or repentence ... or judgment ... and - for cryin' out loud - it isn’t even a prayer! It just seems to be a technicality, some type of legal protocol to be fulfilled in order to annul our vows before Yom Kippur begins. Yay!

But, in fact, there is tremendous depth to what is happening when we say these words. The Torah strongly discourages us from taking vows. This is because most vows are made in moments of weakness and vulnerability. At a point of anger one might make a vow never to speak to a loved one again. At a point of frustration and failure, one might take a vow never to try again. When we take vows, we are creating new barriers and new limitations, as well as new perspectives that are not based on the truth in our hearts but, rather, the emotions of the moment.

On Yom Kippur, we are supposed to rise above those false realities. We are supposed to be able to transcend all past experiences and embrace the world as if it is our first day on the planet. It is, in fact, the first day of the rest of our lives and we are starting with a clean slate. On Yom Kippur we declare that we are ready to give over our past to the Almighty. Everything that happened yesterday is now in His ballpark to fix. The past is His "problem." We have to focus on tomorrow.

Furthermore, at the time when the Kol Nidrei was written, it would not be uncommon for Jews whose behavior was not aligned with the community standards to be excommunicated. They would have to leave their communities and people would not be allowed to associate themselves with these outcasts in any way. Imagine the scene on Yom Kippur eve when the Kol Nidrei was recited and the back door of the Synagogues would open and all of these "sinners" would suddenly be welcomed back into the community! The haunting chant of a seemingly unispiring declaration meant a new life for them, a chance to start again.

Kol Nidrei is about letting go of the dark past for a new beginning infused with new light. It is the declaration that all the pain, negativity, cynicism, and all the chips on my shoulder can no longer exist. During Kol Nidrei we replace yesterday's disappointments with the promise and potential that this year will bring. And what can be more inspiring than that?

May we all be written in the Book of Life!

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Turning Your Weaknesses Into Your Greatest Strength

9/9/2015

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-Nitzavim & Vayelech
Parshat Nitzavim and Vayelech are read every year right around Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur, as Moshe shares with the Jewish people his heartfelt words about returning Hashem no matter how far we have drifted, and how Hashem is always there to “have mercy on you” and “gather you in”.

It is interesting to note that the word for repentance is Teshuva which means “returning”, as if we going back to a place that we have already once been. No matter what we are working on, whether it is to clean up bad behavior or strive to new spiritual heights, it is always a process of returning.

This is because, in truth, we are really not creating anything new. We are returning to a place deep inside us that constantly drives us to reach our potential and be a better person. And when we get there, we discover that it really isn’t new at all. It feels like we belong, that this is really who we are.

Teshuva begins by identifying the areas of life that are the most challenging for us. The great Rabbi Tzadok HaCohen of Lublin was well-known for his teaching that the areas that a person struggles most, those are the areas that he is destined for greatness if he chooses to put in the effort. This is the time of year when we decide which of our struggles are we ready to not only work on, but to transform them and elevate them to a place of holiness.

If we look deeply at the areas that we constantly struggle, we can come to understand new aspects of our personality; what triggers us to act in this way, what are the necessary steps to avoid confrontation with the issue and how to shake off the dust after we have fallen. The struggle itself becomes our threshold to a higher spiritual awareness, a meeting point between us and the Almighty. And, sometimes, we discover that the weakness itself is the key to discovering our greatness.

One of the most amazing examples of this can be found in the beginning of the Book of Yehoshua. As the Jewish nation is gearing up to enter the Land of Israel, Joshua sends two spies to scout out the land. We don’t necessarily know why but, we assume, it is in order to assess the mood of the land. They decide to lodge at the home of a famous prostitute known as Rachav, an interesting decision but, we assume, that since the house of Rachav was a place where the aristocrats of the land spent their leisure time, this was, presumably, a hot spot to really get a sense of the mood of the land.

As the evening progresses, the King of Jericho finds out that there are Jewish spies in town and sends guards to the house of Rachav to get rid of them. Rachav saves the spies by sending the guards on a wild goose chase and then requests that in return, she and her entire household should be saved when the Jewish nation enters to conquer the land.

The Rachav that we observe in the story doesn’t seem to fit the part of what we would imagine. Our Sages teach us that Rachav’s home was the location for all 31 kings of the land to go when they wanted to indulge, and that Rachav would never turn down a client. That seems to be a woman that most of us would not want our children exposed to! And yet, when Rachav speaks to the spies, we hear the voice, not of an immoral wild woman but of some one who has a deep recognition of God and a deep desire to join the Jewish people.

Furthermore, our Sages tell us that after this encounter with these spies Rachav did a complete Teshuva, became the wife of none other than Yehoshua bin Nun, reached a level of prophecy and became the mother of many prophets. How do we understand this?

The commentaries let us in on a much deeper understanding of that story. Rachav wasn’t just a strategic location for the spies to learn about the land, she was the very reason they came. Yehoshua and the spies knew of Rachav and understood that her immodest ways was an untamed and uncontrolled usage of a tremendous potential, a flame of holiness burning inside of her. They saw the a future Jewish leader inside of her, a woman who deeply cared for others, who had endless space in her heart for people- as her name Rachav, which means a wide space, indicates- but at that time had not yet discovered how to use her gift. And they knew that the Jewish people, who had fallen in the desert into the trap of immorality would need a leader who came from that world and overcame it, to provide them with the inspiration to resist the temptations of the land they were about to enter and conquer.

The story of Rachav teaches us that we can never profile another person or ourselves based on the poor decisions of the past. But rather to look deep inside to what might have caused those decisions and see how that source of energy can be used for purity. So often the very same traits that are causing us to sin, can be the traits that will lead us to greatness.

Elul is a time to get to know ourselves. To ask ourselves why we have made the decisions that we made. What really drives us? What is our Neshama really saying? And use that foundation to rebuild and to achieve greatness.

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Together Forever and Ever

8/26/2015

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-Ki Teitzei
The month of Elul is a month of introspection, a time when we are supposed to look deeply at ourselves and our world and ask ourselves what we can do to improve. It is a time when we must look at our relationships, both with the Almighty and with other human beings, and challenge ourselves to make them better. Even if we view ourselves as generally good, kind-hearted and generous people, often when we think about how we relate to the people that are the closest to us, the people who need us most, we are faced with the painful realization that are relationship with them has slipped to become less than satisfactory.

For those who are married, certainly the first place to look when taking inventory of our relationships is to our spouses. Are we living up to our potential in how we treat our significant other? Are we sensitive to their needs? Do we show them enough love? Do we show them the right amount of love? Do we really love them or do we just convince ourselves that we do, when really we just love… ourselves???

Hidden in the words of this week’s Torah portion, Parshat Ki Teitzei, there is a beautiful message about marriage and about relationships in general. But to extract this message, we need to turn to a fascinating Talmudic passage that reveals a most romantic idea, through a seemingly technical law.

In several places in this week’s portion, the Torah refers to the act of marriage as an act of “taking” a spouse. As the Torah never explicitly tells us exactly how to create a marriage between two people, our Sages interpret the language of “taking” as a transaction that can be created through a gift of value, either money, an object or, as is our custom, a ring.

But where do they see that the word “taking” means a monetary-like transaction? The Sages explain that the term “taking” is found when Abraham purchased a burial plot for himself and his wife Sarah in Parshat Chayei Sarah. Just as taking in that incident was referring to a monetary transaction, so too the taking of a spouse can be completed through a monetary-like transaction.

Now, our immediate reaction to this might be some surprise. Of all the places in the Torah to create a connection that will teach us a law about marriage, the best place our Sages could find was an incident of a purchase of a burial plot?

And, yet, as we think about it more we realize how beautiful of a connection this is! Here we find Avraham teaching us an amazing lesson about marriage. He purchases a burial plot for himself next to his wife Sarah, demonstrating that he viewed his connection with Sarah to be one that would endure even after the physical bond has seized to exist. He saw his connection with her as being eternal. That powerful message, demonstrated by his transaction is such an important perspective, the Torah wants us to learn specifically from there what should be on our mind when we enter into a marriage and one that should be on our mind all the time. Our Neshamos, our souls are one, not in this world, but forever.

While this is certainly central to marriage, the concept holds true with all our relationships. The people in our lives are placed there for a reason. For reasons beyond what we can understand, the Almighty is constantly pairing our souls with the other souls that we encounter and we are somehow forging connections that have profound effects on our souls and theirs.

Do we look at every interaction as leaving an eternal impression? Do we feel that the people in our lives are somehow an extension of our souls? Would we treat them any different if we viewed it that way? Would that make us better people? These are certainly important questions to ask ourselves during the month of Elul.        

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Rebirth in The Month of Elul

8/20/2015

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-Shoftim
Parshat Shoftim is read each year on the first Shabbat in the Jewish month of Elul. Shoftim begins with the words “Judges and officers shall you appoint in all your gates”, which Rashi explains to mean in all your cities. But many of the commentaries see a hinted message in these words that related to the month of Elul, and the preparation for the High Holidays that we are supposed to be engaged with during this time.

They explain that during this time we should be taking inventory of our lives and identifying what are the areas that we struggled most in this year. Many of the areas that we pinpoint might be weaknesses in our behavior that can only be fixed if we institute significant changes in our life. Perhaps we need to set up greater boundaries to distance ourselves from certain challenging situations or people. Perhaps we need to reach out to others for help and guidance.

 “Judges and officers shall you appoint in all your gates”, according to these commentaries refers to the “gates” in our life that lead us into situations of trouble and the “judges and officers” being referred to are the measures that we take to make sure we remain safe and secure from falling.

Jewish tradition teaches us that the four Hebrew letters that spell the word Elul is an acronym of the verse  Ani L'dodi V'dodi Li, which means I am to my beloved and my beloved is to me. (Song of Songs 6:3) This is intimate description of King Solomon’s relationship with God defines the theme of the Jewish month of Elul.

Elul is more than just preparation time for the High Holidays. It is a time period infused with the potential to capitalize on the Almighty's love and compassion and completely take down the walls that separate us from experiencing Hashem in high definition through the lens of our daily lives.

The Kabbalists compare the 40 days from when Elul begins until the climax of the High Holidays, Yom Kippur, to the 40 days after the conception of a child in the womb. This is when the initial formation of the child happens and it is the most vulnerable time in the fetus's development. The Talmud says that there are certain aspects of the child that can only be prayed for during these first 40 days, and many Kabbalistic sources say that it is only after 40 days that the fetus receives its soul (interestingly enough, it is around 40 days after conception when we can first detect brain waves).

Corresponding to this, as well, are the 40 days that Moshe spent atop Mount Sinai after the Jewish people received the Torah in order to complete the formation of the Jewish nation after its conception. It is that very formation that we can undergo during these days if we choose to do so. In fact, it is precisely during these 40 days between the beginning of Elul and Yom Kippur that Moshe ascended Mount Sinai for the second time, after the sin of the Golden Calf, to receive the second set of tablets.

This rebirth of the Jewish people wasn't a once-in-history event. It was a recurring experience, an annual opportunity to begin again, to begin a new process of formation, to literally re-create ourselves from a new conception.

The power of Elul doesn't come down on its own. We must initiate. But even the smallest opening, the slightest desire to find new meaning, the smallest spark that begs to be ignited, is enough to bring down this great potential. Like King Solomon we must begin by devoting ourselves to our beloved and then let our beloved do His part in making this season one that will truly be a new beginning.

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Horses, Servants, Spouses and Other Charitable Causes

8/12/2015

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-Re'eh
In this week's Torah portion, Parshat Re'eh, the Torah obligates us to help out the needy. The verses tell us:

If there will be among you a needy person, from one of your brothers in one of your cities ... you shall not harden your heart nor close your hand from your needy brother. Rather, you shall open your hand to him, and you shall lend him sufficient for his needs, which he is lacking. (Devarim 15:7-8)
The great commentator Rashi quotes for us the Talmud's interpretation of this verse (in Ketubot 66b):

" 'Sufficient for his needs what he is lacking:' Even a horse to ride on and a servant to run before him if he is accustomed to this type of lifestyle. 'What he is lacking:' This refers to a spouse (i.e., you should help him find a wife)."

Surprising at it may seem, the Talmud is telling us that when we write out those checks to all of our preferred and very important charitable causes, we shouldn't forget about that neighbor of ours who couldn't make the payments on his car, or second car for that matter and had to forfeit it. Or the family members who just had to cut their domestic help down to one day a week. Or the friends who for the last decade had a beautiful, large home and now have to downsize because of a cut in pay.

While it is important to seek out guidance when we finds ourselves stuck between various good charitable causes, certainly the Torah's message here should not be lost. We learn here that the first step in giving charity is to really try and understand the people around us and what their needs are. We are not absolved from the mitzvah of tzedaka when we write a semi-annual donation to our synagogue, hand a single to the beggar on the corner and attend a gala dinner that at which our friend is being honored. The opportunity to give charity presents itself every single time someone in our life is going through a difficult time.

Often, when we hear a friend or loved one complaining about something that we can't seem to relate to, the thought might cross our mind, "How could you be complaining about this? Why don't you look at all the good you have in your life?" We might compare that person's issues with our own, which, to us, seem so much more difficult. Not to mention that we all unfortunately know someone who is sick with a terminal illness, and that there are children in the world that are starving!

But the truth is that the Almighty sends everyone the challenges and tests that are appropriate for them in that time. Something that might seem trivial to us, for another person could be the source of very deep pain. As the Talmud says, "Even a horse to ride on and a servant to run before him if he is accustomed to this type of lifestyle."

A student of the great Rabbi Moshe Feinstein once entered the home of his teacher just as he was finishing up a meeting with one of the women from the community. From the look on both of their faces it was evident that they both had been crying bitterly. The student asked Rabbi Feinstein what was the cause of all the tears. Rabbi Feinstein answered "I really don't know. This woman came in and sat down at my table and just began to sob. When I saw how much pain she was in, I couldn't control myself and began to sob with her. After a few minutes of crying, she just stopped, thanked me profusely for making her feel better, and left."

Sometimes the greatest form of charity requires us to just stop and take notice of the people around us who are going through an ordeal, and whether or not we can relate, to just empathize with them, cry with them and feel their pain. And if it is within our means to help them through it, it is certainly a worthwhile cause.

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Loving God: What It Means and How to Do It

8/4/2015

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-Ekev
In this week’s Torah portion Parshas Ekev, Moshe gives the Jewish people a tall order:

Now, Israel, what does Hashem ask of you, only to have awe of him, to go in all his ways and to love him with all your heart and all your soul. (Devarim 10:12)

This commandment to love God is not only mentioned here, but it is repeated several times in this week's Torah portion; 23 times in total throughout the Book of Devarim.

The commentaries ask, how is it possible to command someone to have a certain emotion, do we have that much control over our emotions? Can a person love something or someone simply because he or she is told to do so?

Furthermore, what does it mean to love God with all our heart? Surely there are people in our lives who we love very much. Can a person love multiple things, each one with all his heart? Does the love that one has for other things or other people in this world detract from loving God with all his heart?

To understand this commandment, we must make a very important distinction between the mitzvah to love God and most other mitzvot in the Torah. As a general rule, the mitzvot are a set of tools given to us in order to build our spiritual selves, to purify us and allow us access to our Godly soul. They are practical steps that can be performed by anyone, from the simplest Jew to the advanced Torah scholar, that affect us in a very deep way. Simple acts like making a blessing on food can elevate our physical bodies through what we eat. Lighting Shabbat candles can bring peace to the home. And wrapping ourselves in Tallit and Tefillin can help us cleanse our thoughts and physical desires.

But loving God is neither a tool nor a practical step. It is the end goal of all that we are commanded to do, the sum total of our mitzvot, the desired results of living a life of Torah. The more mitzvot we perform, the more we gain an awareness of God, an awareness that quickly becomes a relationship; a relationship that quickly becomes a loving connection and unity. In fact, the very root of the word mitzvah means connection.

The more mitzvot we perform, the more we gain an 
awareness of God, an awareness that quickly
becomes a relationship; a relationship that quickly
becomes a loving connection and unity.
​

This is precisely why the commandment to love God appears in the Torah for the first time in Devarim, more than 80 percent of the way through the Torah! We first needed to build ourselves through Torah before we can even begin to discuss loving God. The Torah isn’t just commanding us to flip a switch in our hearts and start loving God. It is telling us to consciously keep an awareness that the Mitzvot are meant to open us up to that relationship.

When the Torah says to love Hashem with all your heart, it isn’t excluding loving other things. In fact it is through building and loving others that enhances our ability to truly love God. As we experience love in this world, it develops in our heart an understanding of closeness and we can channel that to connect deeper and deeper to Hashem.

Our Sages teach us that when there is love between husband and wife, the Divine Presence rests between them and blessing is found in their home. When we take a spouse, we aren't only entering into a covenant with a significant other, we are entering into a new bond with Hashem. We can now reach new levels of holiness and purity that didn't previously exist, that can only be understood by one who has deeply loved someone in such an intimate way. And when this husband and wife have a child together, they acquire a new title of being partners with Hashem in creating this soul and bringing life into God's world.

A meaningful friendship can also bring one closer to the Almighty. In the book of Pirkei Avos (Ethics of the Fathers), we are taught that when two friends sit together and speak words of Torah (or meaningful discussion) it is as if the Divine Presence rests between them.

Therefore we see that the combination of performing Mitzvot and learning how to love others are the 2 ingredients necessary to fulfilling the ultimate commandment, to love Hashem with all our hearts.
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 I’m So Lonely!

7/23/2015

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-Devarim
This Shabbat, we begin reading of the book of Devarim (Deuteronomy), the last of the Five Books of Moses. The Jewish calendar is organized so that this week’s reading consistently falls on the Shabbos preceding the fast of Tisha B'Av (9th Av), the fast day that commemorates the destruction of the Holy Temple. The reading of the book of Devarim continues throughout the month of Elul and right up until the High Holidays.

The book of Devarim is Moshe’s final message to the Jewish people, told to them in the thirty-seven days before his passing. And as we read each week a little more of his final words, we can actually see how the themes are related to the season that we are in.

On the Shabbos before the ninth of Av, we read his opening words, rebuking the Jewish people for all the trouble they caused throughout the forty years, especially the sin of the spies which occurred on, none other than, the ninth of Av. But as we get deeper into the book of Devarim, Moshe’s words get softer and focus more and more on the themes of loving and cleaving to Hashem and returning to him, the perfect message as we approach High Holidays.  

But there are a few words that Moshe says early on in this week Torah portion that, more than any of his other words, really awaken us transport us in to the Tisha B’av frame of mind. As he is expressing how his frustration for the Jewish people’s behavior in the desert, specifically their “contentiousness, burdens and quarrels”, Moshe asks rhetorically Eichah Esah Levadi, how can I manage this all alone.

These words of frustration are almost identical to the opening words of the Book of Eichah, which is customarily read on the night of Tisha B’Av, when the prophet Yirmiyahu laments the destruction of the Temple and opens with the exclamation “Eichah Yashva Badad”, how is it that we now find ourselves all alone. 

This cry of “how can I manage through this loneliness” that we hear from Moshe and then echoed by Yirmiyahu, captures the essence of what the day of Tisha B’Av is about.

Many people feel disconnected from the day of Tisha B’Av. How can we connect to the destruction of the Temple when we have no idea what it was like to have a Temple? But, in fact, whether we realize it or not, we are all well aware of what the loss of the Temple feels like. It is the feeling of “how can I manage with this loneliness”, the loneliness that we all contend with at some point or another, or maybe all the time.

It is the lonely feeling we have when we are going through a challenging time in our life and can’t understand what we did to deserve it. It is the feeling of knowing that we have a mission to accomplish, yet we feel like we took a wrong turn at some point and can’t seem to find our way back. It is the feeling you get when you have heard all the advice, and all the suggestions, and all the philosophy and all the opinions, and you still feel stuck.

That loneliness is the loss of the Temple. That loneliness is Tisha B’Av.    

But just as the tears of Tisha B’av will soon turn into the love of Elul and the closeness of the High Holidays, we too must carry on strong, no matter how lonely we feel, and remember that our dark days will also soon turn to days of love. As long as we hold on strong, just a little bit longer.   


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Dreaming of Israel

7/15/2015

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-Parshat Matos/Massei
This week’s Torah portion, Matos and Massei, relay the events leading up to the Jewish Nation’s entry into Israel. Following the war with Midian, the tribes of Reuven and Gad approach Moshe requesting to take their share of the land in the conquered territories east of the River Jordan rather than in Israel proper. They reasoned that since God had blessed them with more wealth and belongings than could comfortably fit on any plot of land that they would be awarded in Israel, clearly their role was to be supporters of the Jewish people in Israel by taking good care of the material wealth God gave them and helping out their brothers.

Even so, Moshe scolded the sons of Reuven and Gad, suggesting and only after binding them with a detailed set of conditions that they would have to stand with their brothers in Israel when they went to war to conquer the land, did he agree to allow them to make their home outside of Israel.

One can certainly understand why this Torah portion is read each year during the Three Weeks of Mourning for the Temple. Moshe’s disapproval of their original request shows how a Jew should always by yearning to live in Israel, even if there is a legitimate reason to live in the Diaspora. This is certainly the purpose of the Three Weeks leading up to Tisha B’Av, as it establishes a time in the calendar when we are forced to stop and think about Israel and the Temple and contemplate our connection to the Land.

On my most recent trip to Israel with a group of local men, we were all amazed by how vibrant and joyous the people of Israel were, despite a year full of fear and tears. Where does their strength come from? How is it that a war-ravaged country with few natural resources are at the forefront of scientific and technological achievement with the longest life expectancy of any nation in the world?

It is clear to see that it is a sense of meaning and higher purpose that feeds their drive, their resilience, their pride and their dreams. They live with passion and intensity, knowing that they are living the dream of Jews for thousands of years who never had this opportunity. And there is the deep awareness of both the religious and secular Jews that they are in the spiritual epicenter of the world that fuels their joy and vitality.


As Jews in the Diaspora, we, like the Tribes of Reuven and Gad, must do what we can to support Israel by being outspoken advocates for Israel in an era where so many around us are turning cold. We need to support organizations that support Israel. We must pray for Israel and certainly visit Israel whenever we have the opportunity.

And most importantly, we can never ever stop dreaming about the coming of Moshiach, when Israel we be our undisputed home. We are seeing before our eyes the very beginnings of that dream come true. Our prayers, our tears and our longing for the final redemption will certainly be the catalyst to bring it all home.  

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The Heifer, the Rock and Selfless Leadership

6/22/2015

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-Chukas
This week's Torah portion opens with the laws of the red heifer, a special sacrifice brought in Temple times. Its ashes were used to purify those who had come into contact with a corpse. These laws give the Torah portion its name, Chukat, which literally means a decree, specifically one whose deeper significance we can't fully comprehend.

The Midrash says that one of the most mysterious parts of the law of the red heifer is the fact that those who engage in its preparation become contaminated, thereby causing quite a puzzling outcome: the one who was started out impure is now pure, but the one worked on his behalf to help purify him is now rendered impure.

The Torah portion then resumes telling us of the adventures of the Jewish people in the desert. It is now 38 years since last week's incident of the spies, as a new generation of Jews stands ready to enter the Promised Land. The Jewish people complain that they lack water, and God commands Moshe to "speak to the rock before their eyes that it shall give water" (Bamidbar 20:8). Moshe hits the rock instead and - here's the heartbreaking ending we all know - Moshe is denied entry into Israel as punishment for disobeying God.

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The commentaries wonder about the connection between the laws of the red heifer and the story of Moshe hitting the rock and why those laws are specifically written here, especially since they were given to the Jewish people many years earlier?

I would like to suggest an answer based the Midrash we mention earlier. Perhaps God told Moshe to write these laws here because the paradox of the red heifer is in fact the paradox of Moshe's life. The ones who began impure - in our case the Jewish people, are now "pure" (i.e. worthy to enter the Land of Israel). But the one who worked so hard on their behalf, Moshe, is now rendered "impure" (i.e. unfit to enter the land because of them).

Moshe was the greatest Jewish leader to ever live. At several points in the Torah, Moshe has the opportunity to turn his back on the Jewish people and do what is best for himself and his personal relationship with God. But he never does. He continues to fight for the Jewish people at all costs. When the Jewish people fall into the dirt, Moshe is right there to get himself dirty trying to save them, as long as it means that at the end, they will merit to see the fulfillment of God's promise to Abraham.

A true leader, a true visionary, doesn't always get to see his dreams realized, but that doesn't stop him from putting it all on the line. The great Sage the Baal Shem Tov would say, "I would go down into Gehinom (Hell) if it meant being able to pull out even one Jew from there," and true to his words, there are several stories where he risked all of his World to Come for the sake of bringing other Jews closer.

It is truly a mystery why the hero should ever have to die at the end of the story. It is the chok of the red heifer and the mystery of the story of Moshe that only God can answer. But it is the trait of a true Jewish leader, a true visionary and even a true friend to be ready to take the fall in order to help another up.
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Caleb, Courage and Canines

6/9/2015

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-Shelach
This week’s Torah portion, Parshat Shelach, is set only a few days before the Jewish people were supposed to enter the Land of Israel. Apprehensive about their upcoming battles against the nations of Canaan, they request of Moshe to send 12 spies to check out the land. Moshe confers with the Almighty, who allows the spies to go, although the Torah alludes to the fact that this was less than preferable.

The spies see a land that they feel is unconquerable and bring back a report that breaks the hearts and spirits of the Jewish people. As panic begins to break out and the nation is ready to attack Moshe and Aharon, Yehoshua (Joshua) and Kalev (Caleb) step in to defend the Land of Israel.

Is we take a look at these two heroes, we see a significant difference between them. Yehoshua was Moshe’s prime student. He has already been introduced to us many times in the Torah as one who stands by his teacher, never leaving his side, thirstily drinking from every word he says. In this week’s Torah portion itself, the Torah alludes to Moshe giving Yehoshua strength to overcome this challenge in the form of adding a letter to his name.

But Kalev is a personality that we have don’t know too much about. What strikes us first about him is his unusual name. The name Kalev has the same letters as the word Kelev, which is Hebrew for dog. Where is the glory in that name?

Perhaps, if we properly understand the challenge that the spies presented and the character trait that Kalev displayed, we can understand how theKelev teaches us an important lesson about how to navigate through life’s challenges.

"If we stay true to our hearts than, like a Kelev and like
Kalev, we can be confident that our master, the Master
of the Worlds, is right behind us, watching us, and
making sure that we reach our destination safely."
​

The spies were not evil people. They were selected because of their righteousness. They believed in God and saw all of the miracles that He had done to get the Jewish nation to this point. But they also realized that at some point the miraculous lifestyle that the Jewish people were experiencing was going to stop. At some point, God was going to say, “I did my part to get you here, now you need to learn how to stand up on your own to your enemies, while I take a backseat.” The spies felt that they were just not yet ready for that challenge of living life when the Divine Providence is concealed.

But Kalev understood, that even when Hashem is concealed, if the Jewish people go forth with full strength and confidence, Hashem will be right there behind them, even if is He is “unseen”.

So what does this have to do with dogs? Well, simply take note of the difference between an owner walking his dog compared to any other animal. While other animals need to be pulled by their owner and directed where to go, the dog proudly walks in front of its master with full confidence that even though he isn’t visible, he is right there, leading him from behind.

In fact the root of the word Kelev is Lev which means heart. Because the dog runs ahead excited by the possibilities of where the journey might go, knowing that with his master behind him, he cannot fail.

Kalev was different than Yehoshua. He did not have that same close connection with Moshe, who would be able to guide him how to act in every situation. Kalev was a self-made leader. Kalev lived by his heart. He understood that in the desert, Hashem leads us by walking “in front” of us, but in Israel Hashem would lead us from “behind”. He wasn’t removing His Providence from us, just waiting for us to take the first steps with our hearts, and he would be right there behind us, guiding us from that perspective.  

We learn an important lesson from Kalev. At times we feel we have clarity in life, that Hashem is leading us from “in front” and we can simply follow along. But sometimes Hashem conceals himself, and we are left with no choice but to move ahead following only what we believe deeply in our hearts is real and true. But if we stay true to our hearts than, like a Kelev and like Kalev, we can be confident that our master, the Master of the Worlds, is right behind us, watching us, and making sure that we reach our destination safely. 
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Shavuot: A Time to Stop and Celebrate

5/20/2015

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The holiday of Shavuot is here once again! Beginning this Saturday night, the Jewish people will be celebrating our most precious gift from the Almighty, the Torah. Through all-night studying of Torah (and mass consumption of assorted cheesecakes), we will attempt to transport ourselves back to those moments when the entire Jewish nation stood beneath Mount Sinai witnessing the epic display of thunder, lightning and the direct word of God as we accepted His proposal by declaring, "We will do and we will listen!"

Shavuot is one of two holidays in the Jewish calendar referred to with another name, Atzeret. The root of the word Atzeret is atzur, which means to halt. Both the holiday of Shavuot and the final day of Sukkot, known as Shemini Atzeret, share this same theme, where the Almighty is asking us to stop for a short time, to seize the day and to spend it with Him.

Shavuot and Shemini Atzeret share a few similarities. They both come after a 50-day period when the Jewish people put extra effort into self-growth. Shemini Atzeret comes after a month of Elul, the focus of which is reflection for the New Year, followed by three weeks that feature the High Holidays and Sukkot. Shavuot also comes after a 50-day period of the counting of the Omer that began with Passover.

And both of these holidays don't bring on any exciting mitzvot like shofar, matzah or sukkah. (The beautiful custom of all-night learning is attributed to the Arizal, a 16th-century Kabbalist; it is not a Torah commandment or even a Rabbinic institution.)

The common theme of these two days is best described in the name that they share: Atzeret, halting. After a set period of time when we are challenged to climb from level to level on the ladder of spiritual growth, we finally get to that place when we can look within ourselves and feel the sense of having arrived. It is precisely then that our Father in Heaven looks down at us, bursting with love and admiration at His beloved people, and tells us, "My dear children, now that you have arrived, why don't you stick around just one more day so we can celebrate your accomplishments together." This is Shavuot. This is the final day of Sukkot. This is the deeper meaning of Atzeret.

May this year's celebration be one that truly brings us back to Sinai, reconnecting us to the feelings of love and excitement for the Torah that we had on that day and bringing us closer to our Father in Heaven who so much looks forward to spending one more day of "quality time" with His beloved children.

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When in the Desert; Never Let Go of Sinai

5/19/2015

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-Bamidbar
Every year, Parshat Bamidbar is read on the Shabbat before the holiday of Shavuot. The portions that are read around holiday times are not there coincidently, and it is incumbent upon us to try to pinpoint the connection between the Parshah and the holiday, and how the message of the Torah portion can help us connect to the theme of the holiday in a deeper way.

Parshat Bamidbar describes the formation of the encampment of the Jewish nation during their time in the desert. The twelve tribes of Israel were to be encamped around the Sanctuary in four groups of three tribes each and to travel in that same formation.

But this was not the first time that the people were positioned in this formation. The commentaries explain that this was directly parallel to the way they encamped around Sinai at the time of the Giving of the Torah. And that formation was not original either. Our Sages further teach us that the arrangement of the four camps corresponds to the "four camps of the Divine Presence" and the "four camps of angels" that surround Hashem’s Throne of Glory. At Sinai, when the Jewish nation reached a very high level of prophecy and witnessed this heavenly formation they also requested to parallel that formation on this world and that become the model for their encampment both at Sinai and in the desert.

The idea that the Jewish people would be replicating their Sinai formation as they travelled through the desert is certainly a wonderful idea, portraying how the Jewish people were try to maintain that level of expanded consciousness no matter where they journey took them. 

But furthermore, when we consider that the wandering in the desert and the many stops that Jewish people made represented the future wandering the Jewish nation would have to do for most of our history, we see a whole new depth to the significance of this formation.  The Jews traveling from place to place in the Sinai formation is a representation that no matter where we would find ourselves throughout the ages, no matter how many stops we would have to make in our wanderings through Exile, no matter how many times we will need to “break camp” and rebuild at the next stop, we would always maintain our formation, and try to recreate Sinai in our new home.

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In fact, this has been our story. All of those years “in the desert” without a homeland, constantly being attacked by the animals and the elements that are the nations of the world, we rebuilt and recreated ourselves again and again. We re-established Sinai.   

Thus we see a very strong connection to the holiday of Shavuot which this reading precedes. Shavuot is a day of reaccepting the Torah and reestablishing our connection to Sinai.  In our daily prayers we ask Hashem to “Give us our portion in Torah”. We are asking Hashem to help us see the relevance of Torah in our lives, to open our eyes to the Torah messages that will awaken our souls and allow us to discover our unique path to Hashem. On Shavuos, we merit that those prayers are answered, as we are all judged in this area.

May each one of us merit to have our prayers answered and to use this time to reestablish our own Sinai.  
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The Secret to Staying Inspired

5/12/2015

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-Emor
Parshat Emor presents us with an unusual combination of laws that span a wide spectrum of area of Jewish life.  Among other laws, The Parsha spends a significant amount of time on the following three seemingly unrelated topics:

1-      Various laws relating to the Kohen including which deceased relatives he may come into contact with, who is eligible to marry him and what handicaps and blemishes render him unfit to serve in the Mishkan.

2-      The Cycle of the Festivals of the Jewish calendar and their laws

3-      Laws pertaining to the Menorah, the Table and the Showbread that were in the Tabernacle

As we learn through the Parsha, one has to wonder about the connection between these topics and why they were chosen to be placed together at this point in the Torah.

To understand the unifying thread, perhaps we can apply a well-known principle in Jewish myticsm known as Olam-Shanah-Nefesh which means that every aspect of holiness can be found in a higher intensity and concentration in specific places (Olam), during specific times (Shanah) and embodied in specific holy individuals (nefesh).

Based on this we can suggest a connection between these three topics. The Torah is giving an address to go to for inspiration, when we need to turn up our sense of awareness of the Divine Presence in the world, when we need to connect in a deeper way. And that address manifests itself in a person, the Kohen, who is asked to live an exalted level and adhere to laws that will maintain absolute sanctity and purity. It can be found during specific times, the Holidays of the Jewish calendar. And it can be found at all times in the Tabernacle.  Thus the Torah puts these three together.

Nowadays we don’t have a Tabernacle, and without one, the status of the Kohen has also been significantly diminished as well. Even the holidays have lost some of their inspiration without the special service. But there is still a very important message we must take away from this week’s Torah portion.

Perhaps, the greatest challenge we all face is the challenge of maintaining inspiration. The daily grind wears us down, the constant pressures of day-to-day life zap us of our energy and often we lose our fight. The key to staying inspired is finding your oasis in Olam-Shan- Nefesh, in space, in time and in others.

In “space”, means that we need to find a location which is our special place to reconnect. Whether it is attending Synagogue for prayers, a quiet place outdoors to think, a corner in our home to meditate or frequent trips to Israel, we need to discover a place that helps us access that inner energy and brings it forth. 

In “time” means that we designate specific times in our schedule where we disconnect from the noise, drama, stress and intensity of everything going on in our lives. During that time, we focus inward to remind ourselves who we really are, what we really feel, our hopes, our dreams, and our values.

And finally in “others” means that we find role models in our life who inspire us and who bring out the best in us. It means identifying those who embody what we are trying to grow towards. People we can observe, talk to and learn from.  

Parshat Emor is teaching us how the secret of spiritual survival lies in discovering the Kohen in our life, whoever that may be, the Holiday moments in our schedule, whenever they may be, and the Sanctuaries in our world, wherever we might discover them.          

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Sefirat HaOmer: The Seven Pathways of the Heart

4/8/2015

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On the second night of Pesach, while we are all still on a high from an uplifting Seder, we begin the fulfillment of another important annual mitzvah, the counting of the Omer. The next seven weeks, between the beginning of Pesach and Shavuot, are known in Jewish tradition as Sefirat HaOmer, which literally means counting of the Omer.

During this period which, during Temple times, commenced with the bringing of the Omer offering, we count each day in anticipation of the holiday of Shavuot and our annual re-acceptance of the Torah. The Omer is a very powerful and auspicious time for every one of us to focus on character development and become the proper vessels to be able to receive the Torah on Shavuot.

In Kabbalistic tradition, there are seven core character traits that are the roots of all other positive and negative character traits. By perfecting each one of these traits, we can genuinely live in the image of God and attain true inner wholeness. Each of these seven weeks presents a time to focus on one of these character traits and work on perfecting it and each day of the week gives us chance to work on each trait in relation to the trait of the week. So, by day 49, we have worked on several different combinations of traits and understood how they intersect.  Each trait builds on the one before it, like laying a brick on the one beneath it, and by working on these character traits we create perfect balance in our lives.

The seven traits are:
Chessed (Loving-Kindness): Becoming a giver; giving for the sake of giving alone.

Gevurah (Discipline): Creating boundaries; saying no to yourself and to others even when it is difficult.

Tiferet (Harmony): Finding balance in life; searching for the true path of living; showing compassion.

Netzach (Dominance): Showing bravery and perseverance; not giving up; taking responsibility.

Hod (Splendor): Showing empathy to others; learning how to speak softly and listen.

Yesod (Foundation): Deep connection with others; Elevating all aspects of the mundane; sexual purity.

Malchus (Kingship): Leadership through powerful communication and expression.   

The Seder and the mitzvah of Sefirat HaOmer that immediately follows teach us an important lesson about change. The Seder is exciting, uplifting, animated and dynamic. Sefirat HaOmer is slow, consistent and systematic. We count every single day, one by one, focusing on a different aspect of our personality.

In order to improve ourselves we need both; exciting, motivational and inspirational moments when we feel like we can conquer the world, as well as a clear and steady plan of how we are going to implement that. If we rely solely on the excitement of those moments of inspiration, we are setting ourselves up for failure because those moments are, in fact, short-lived.

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The Three C’s of Great Leadership

4/1/2015

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-Pinchas
Parshat Pinchas introduces us to an array of great Jewish heroes. The Parsha contains 3 stories that illustrate what true leadership and heroism mean from a Torah perspective.

The Torah portion begins with the Almighty rewarding Pinchas for his zealous act to sanctify God's name. When a Jew named Zimri publicly disgraced the Jewish people by having sexual relations with a Midianite woman and challenging Moshe and the Jewish people in front of the Tabernacle, Pinchas reacted by bravely grabbing a spear and ending the lives of both Zimri and the Midianite woman.

A short while later, we learn about the daughters of a man named Tzlafchad. Tzlafchad had died with no sons, and the daughters were concerned that their family would have no portion in the Land of Israel. Now, confronting Moshe and issuing a challenge to the system could have definitely been viewed as a rebellion of some sort especially in the wake of many other rebellions that we have been reading about. But for these women, their love for Israel was too strong to allow them to sit and remain silent and lose the potential opportunity to be part of inheriting the land.

The third story in the Torah is Moshe transferring his leadership mantle to Yehoshua. Rashi explains that Moshe had anticipated that his sons would inherit the leadership role. Yehoshua was not necessarily the obvious pick for the next leader, but because of his dedication to his teacher Moshe and because of his bravery during the incident of the spies, he was in fact rewarded with this

Why does the Torah group these three incidents so close together? It seems that these three chapters teach us 3 essential traits- the 3 C’s of great leadership: Conviction, Confidence, and Commitment.   

In Pinchas we see the passion and the zeal to stand up for what he knew was right and wrong. Though, there are almost no circumstances when a person can resort to violence, Pinchas understood in his very blood that this situation called for him to challenge those who were causing disgracing of God's Name. He realized that behavior that would cause others to fall, disgrace Torah scholars and bring others to frown upon the Jewish people was crossing the line and called for extreme action.

Tzlafchad’s daughters showed confidence to stand up to the greatest leader of all time and suggest that he was doing something wrong. They were not to be content with their spiritual status and, therefore saw something that Moshe did not. And they had the courage to speak up and say what they saw.

And in Yehoshua we see an incredible commitment to his teacher Moshe, the ideal protégé and, therefore the one most suitable one to carry the torch to the next generation. This commitment to the values that he was taught, allowed him to withstand the pressure put on him by the other spies, even at a moment of great uncertainty.

In our own leadership role, we must learn to establish what are our principles that we will be unwavering about. We need to have the bravery to challenge the system when the system seems broken. And, finally, we need to have commitment to a set of values that will carry us even when we lack clarity.  

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What is God Trying to Tell Me?

4/1/2015

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-Naso
In Parshat Naso, we are taught the laws of the Sotah, a woman charged with cheating on her husband, and the laws of the Nazir, a man who voluntarily separates himself from wine. Rashi comments on the juxtaposition of the two and says that the Torah is teaching us that those who are exposed to a woman undergoing the Sotah process must separate themselves from wine. This is because when we see someone acting inappropriately, God is also sending us a message to pay extra attention to our own attitudes and uproot any potential behavior that could bring us to a similar situation.

This idea of using the demise of someone else as impetus to look inwards is certainly a sharp piercing message.  Our Sages challenge us to never view ourselves as an outsider. Everyone we meet is a teacher in some way, and every situation is an opportunity to learn. To quote Helen Keller “Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.” 

With this in mind, we have a new appreciation for the words of our sages “Who is wise? One who learn from all people.” Our sages are not only referring to people that we look up to or are impressed with, but even people who we look down at, people we really don’t like being around, those who do the little things that get under our skin, acts that we frown upon, and display character traits we view as negative. Those people, too, can be our greatest teachers, if we take to heart what message we are supposed to be taking way from them. This is true with a boss, coworker, spouse, even a child who is acting disrespectfully.

This is especially true since very often we notice things in others that really exist inside of ourselves. We tend to love and hate things in other people according to what we love and hate about ourselves. A character trait that we ourselves don’t possess won’t affect us when we see it in someone else. Therefore when we see a flaw in someone else and it bothers us, e.g. “he’s so irresponsible”, “she’s so into herself”, we must ask the question, is there something that is really bothering me about myself that I am just projecting onto this person?

Additionally, the Almighty in his infinite perfection designed the world in a way that a person’s surroundings are tailor made to convey the lessons that one has to learn. When we see something that bothers us, He is sending us a personal message. When someone gives us a criticism and our knee-jerk reaction is to blow it off as illegitimate, we have to realize that for some reason or another, the Almighty wanted us to hear these words.

There is a story about a righteous man who once saw a child acting wildly in the street. He pulled the child aside and sharply scolded him, “go back to your Cheder (day school)”. The brazen child looked the righteous man square in the eye and with full blown Chutzpah responded, “Maybe YOU should go back to Cheder!” The righteous man took this as a message that he was neglecting certain areas of study and that he had to designate additional time for them.

Life is a constant learning experience. But it is our job to never let a lesson slip away, but rather to take every opportunity to ask ourselves “What is the Almighty trying to tell me?”

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Is it a Mitzvah to be Happy?

4/1/2015

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-Ki Tavo
There is an old Jewish saying “Mitzvah Gedolah Leeyot B’Simcha,” meaning “It is a big Mitzvah to be happy.” Where is this Mitzvah found in the Torah? Is in fact one of the 613 Mitzvot to be happy?

Perhaps the most explicit Torah source commanding us to be happy is found in this week’s Parsha, Parshat Ki Tavo, and it is found in a most unusual place. As the Torah delivers sharp rebuke to those generations that will disregard the Torah, the Torah states that the reason this will come about it “because you did not serve Hashem, your God, amid gladness and a good heart, when everything was abundant” (Devarim 28:47).

Here the Torah is teaching us how to ensure that our spiritual service and performance of Mitzvos will remain strong and that evil will not befall us. It isn’t just about doing it. It is about how you do it.

We often meet Jews who are meticulous about Jewish law and performance of Mitzvot, but they do it sluggishly with a chip on their shoulder, with no joy. Does this kind of service to Hashem last? Will they be able to pass this on to their children?

Our Sages teach us “Make his desire, your desire, in order that he’ll make your desire his desire” (Avos 2:4). When we are performing Mitzvos, it should be evident that this is something that is enjoyable and desirable for us, that we are thrilled that we have the opportunity.

Now, perhaps you are wondering, what if I don’t enjoy performing Mitzvos? What if I feel disconnected and even burdened by them?

The Talmud addresses that question and tells us to “Do the Mitzvah for alternative reasons, and you will end up doing it for the sake of the Mitzvah itself”. In other words, “Fake it till you make it”!

You see, like all great things in life, to really appreciate the full pleasure of the Mitzvah itself we must develop a taste for it, which does in fact take time. But there is a certain sweetness in Mitzvos that one can access without reaching saintly levels or lofty sensitivities.  Metaphorically speaking, it is a way of biting into the chocolate coating until you get to the peanut butter filling. Allow me to illustrate.  

A good L’Chaim, a lively Niggun, a pot of cholent, a beautiful Mezuzah case, Kiddush cup, or Tallis bag, silver Candlesticks, even a good laugh, these are just some of the things that make the Mitzvos so much more special.  The more we beautify the Mitzvah for ourselves, the closer we’ll get to experiencing the true pleasure hidden within. We might even come to realize that it was this pleasure that was really driving us all along.   

With this appreciation we can understand another statement by our Sages, “the payment for a Mitzvah is a Mitzvah”. What kind of payment is that? Isn’t payment for our Mitzvot supposed to be in the World to Come? The answer is, of course there is a World to Come, but there is also a beautiful world of spirituality that is right before your eyes, waiting to unfold, where each Mitzvah itself becomes a pleasure, a delight, a reward! And when we perform a Mitzvah with proper enthusiasm it opens up the door to a new one, until we develop a new taste for the Mitzvah, and it becomes… rewarding!

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Heart to Heart Communication

3/31/2015

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-Acharei/Kedoshim
Perhaps one of the most well-known and universally accepted Torah commandments is “You shall love your fellow like yourself” a commandment found in this week’s Torah portion, Parshat Kedoshim. When we take a look at the Torah portion, however, we see that this Mitvzah does not stand alone. There are in fact several more specific commandments that lead up to these words that perhaps quantify a bit more, what the Torah is referring to when it speaks about loving another.

In the verse that precedes this, the Torah states Do not hate your brother in your heart, you shall reprove your fellow and do not bear sin because of him (which the commentaries explain mean that you shall not embarrass him).  By juxtaposing the commandment to reprove your fellow right next to the prohibition to hate your brother in you heart, the Torah teaches us a lesson that is pivotal for human relationships and effective communication.

There is a beautiful verse in Mishlei that states “As water reflects a face to a face so to one person’s heart is reflected in another.” The real meaningful messages we want others to accept don’t travel with sound waves. They travel from heart to heart, from soul to soul.

The great Rebbi R’ Simcha Bunim (of P’shischa) asks the question, why is it that the verse compares the reflection of hearts to water and not simply a mirror. He answers by noting a very important difference between the reflection of water and the reflection of a mirror. Water only reflects things that get close to it. As long as there is a distance, the reflection isn’t seen. So too, we can only expect that the feelings in our heart will be reflected by our loved ones, once we have minimized the space between us and them, and brought them closer.

This is the secret to positive and meaningful communication between spouses, and between parents and children. From time to time sharp words must be said, but if we would first take two minutes to remind ourselves how much we love this person, or what virtues this person has, we can actually see that our message will be heard with much more acceptance. How much more so, if we actually preempt our rebuke with a brief expression of those feelings! However, if what we are feeling inside is, “he is lazy, she is so irresponsible, how annoying, etc.” than even if we try to cushion are rebuke with some superficial kind words, our message will be rejected and that same negative energy that we are giving off will be reflected right back onto us. This creates a transparent but very firm wall of negativity that separates us and the person who we truly love.

Our sages teach that “words that are spoken from the heart, enter the heart”. to really inspire someone, to really touch someone’s heart, to really cheer someone up who is going through a difficult time, to really make a person feel loved, or feel joy, we can’t just talk the talk, we must fully be there with them in a much deeper way.  So speak less. Feel more. And let the love and joy in your heart be reflected in theirs!    

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The Power of Positive Thinking

3/25/2015

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-Tzav
This week’s Torah portion, Parshat Tzav, continues with the instructions for the various different sacrifices that would be brought in the Mishkan. And, though, the discussions about the Sacrifices might seem irrelevant to our modern-day lives, there are, in fact, many lessons to be learned from these Torah portions is we delve just a little bit beneath the surface.

All the Sacrifices that we are reading about, essentially fit into one of three categories. The first category is the Sin-offering, brought for a specific transgression one might have committed (this includes both the categories known as the Chatas as well as the Asham). The second is the Elevation offering, known as theOlah, which is brought both as part of the daily service in the Mishkan as well as voluntarily. This Sacrifice atones for a missed opportunity to perform a positive commandment as well as impure thoughts that a person is having. The third category is referred to as the Peace-offering, the Shelamim, which does not atone for anything, rather it is brought as a symbol of appreciation to Hashem.

When we take a close look at the instructions for how to bring these sacrifices, it becomes evident that the Torah is informing us of an important tool for self-improvement. When informing us of the location on the Altar where the Olah Elevation-Offering is brought, the Torah says “Slaughter it at the side of the Altar, to the North”. However, when letting us know the location to bring the Chatas Sin-Offering, the Torah says “in the place where you slaughter the Olah, you shall slaughter the Chatas”. And the question arises, why link the Chatas to the Olah? Why not just tell us the location? And what might this have to do with us?

The relationship between the Chatas and the Olah teaches us about the relationship between our actions and our thoughts. It is human nature to focus heavily on action and performance, and to somewhat overlook our thinking patterns. When we plan our day, we plan on what we have to do. When we reflect on the day, we think about what we did. When we try to improve, we focus on what we can do better.

What we often forget is that just as important as whether our actions are positive or negative, is whether our mode of thinking is positive or negative. In fact, masters of Jewish self-improvement teach us that real character development is actually more about how we think and feel. If we carry inside of our us angry thoughts, bitter thoughts, sad thoughts, or any other kind of negativity, those thoughts can consume us, zap us of our energy and happiness and ultimately spillover to how we live our lives.

We are supposed to begin our day making sure that we are in the right state of mind to live up to our potential for that day. At the end of the day, we need to think back as to what kind of negative voices we might have picked up over the day. And when we focus on improving, we need to think about what are the thoughts inside our head that are holding us back from living life to the fullest.

With this we can understand why the Torah links the Sin-offering to the Elevation offering. The Torah is telling you that a person who is not working on elevating his thoughts and learning how to think positively, will ultimately find himself faulting in his actions as well. But a person who learns to think positively, will see an automatic difference in his behavior as well. 

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